How The Universe Works

I studied Philosophy and Literature at Warwick University 1988-91 and really feel I have since discovered the answer to everything, crazy though that may seem...

The course was abbreviated to Phil/Lit and indeed "feel it" is kind of the answer, trust your gut. GUT is also an acronym for Grand Unified Theory. Science hasn't found one yet because it focuses mainly on the external quantifiable world. In order to live up to its name, a Grand Unified Theory really needs to unify everything, including the rich internal world of dreams, love, imagination, madness and emotions.

Internal and external are arbitrary divisions anyway and Philosophy led me to consider how we can ever truly know whether our perceptions agree with external "things in themselves" anyway. The Alice In Wonderland world of quantum physics shows us that nothing is quite what it seems, and solidity is an illusion. Atoms mainly consist of nothing, the space between electrons (which are said only to exist in a probability cloud) and the nucleus, made up of protons and neutrons. To explain what constitutes the nucleus, scientists are currently clutching at quarks (which possess among other properties, strangeness and charm!), because they're not quite ready to admit that nothing is actually there at all. They're creating theories, as thinking creates things. Everything is energy, even e-motion is energy in motion, and energy itself is an illusion, a tension created by thinking what we see is not ourselves. There is just nothing perceiving its own nothingness and everything is that perception. The answers are everywhere and in everything (and in nothing, as everything and nothing are the same: now here = nowhere, zero is an infinite circle). You are the answer to yourself, and it's all about perception. That's why I = eye, and e=mc2 is 2cme (to see me) backwards; the world is a reflection of your mind, and you have the answers within you. This is why self-awareness and self-fulfilment are so important too.

In 1999 while living in London and after several months of panic attacks and severe anxiety due to a 9 year relationship ending, I had an epiphany while sitting by the sea on a trip to Brighton. As the waves ebbed and flowed, they seemed like the events and emotions in life, and I saw the sun shining off the see as a constant source of power, an energy we can all access anytime. It reminded me that I have my own infinite potential power. From then on, my mind did a 180 degree switch, and I realised how I looked at everything was the key to everything. I've always been a bit obsessed with how I look, and in a way, I was right to be, but the answer lay not in how I looked physically, but in how I looked at the world, although the two are clearly linked. I did a quick sketch to illustrate that moment:

I had felt insecure, then realised IN the way you SEE is the CURE; I had all the answers I needed inside me, just as everything is the answer to itself.

It completely changed my outlook on life and I haven't had a panic attack in more than 2 decades since, despite a few stressful times along the way, including another long term relationship break up. In 1999 the immediate aftermath of this profound realisation was five months of sheer stratospheric joy, where I felt an intense and deep gratitude for every second of existence and a heightened awareness of the connection between my thoughts and my experiences. This feeling and awareness is still with me, and only ever a thought away. After 5 months I felt happy to settle down to a gentler, less heightened experience of life though, because I found that so much high intensity happiness was actually a little scary at times!

NB A friend lent me the down to earth and reassuring Panic Attack book on the right around this time, and I highly recommend it if you are going through a similar experience, as it enabled me to see how my overwhelming feelings were actually helping me. I also found Bring Out The Magic In Your Mind in my early 20s in a charity shop, which also had a big impact on my thinking.

In the year 2000, I wrote an 8 page booklet which aimed to spark that same appreciation and excitement for life in others. I handed this out to friends and randomly to strangers I met in London, usually whenever the theme of coincidence came up. This led to an art exhibition in 2001, which itself became a vortex of coincidence. I have also written and performed 3 times in a How The Universe Works (The Answer to Everything) Hastings Fringe show, and a talk of the same name.

I'll upload my original booklet and one I wrote for the show, which includes a word coincidence dictionary, plus some Philosophy essays from university. I'm also planning some short videos based on my fringe show, so people can have access to an awareness that can potentially bring great happiness. It also brings the astonishing and emotional realisation that the world is your mind, so my aim is that it will lead people to treat others better, as they are part of you on the deepest level, as well as inspire a desire in everyone to protect and preserve the whole planet on which we depend.